1095 (days) + 1@a time = 3
surrender
Muddy Water

“Muddy water is best cleared by leaving it alone.” – Alan Watts
When I Am Among The Trees – Mary Oliver
When I am among the trees,
especially the willows and the honey locust,
equally the beech, the oaks, and the pines,
they give off such hints of gladness.
I would almost say that they save me, and daily.
I am so distant from the hope of myself,
in which I have goodness, and discernment,
and never hurry through the world
but walk slowly, and bow often.
Around me the trees stir in their leaves
and call out, “Stay awhile.”
The light flows from their branches.
And they call again, “It’s simple,” they say,
“and you too have come
into the world to do this, to go easy, to be filled
with light, and to shine.

an alba is a lyrical love song sung by troubadours, often about leaving each other at dawn
26 Alba Street

they just keep existing
I went out on the porch before dawn to think of these things, and of the words of Ezekiel (22:30): “And I sought among them for a man that might set up a hedge and stand in the gap before me in favor of the land that I might not destroy it, and I found none.” And while I was standing there, quails began to whistle all over the field and in the wood. I had not heard any for weeks and thought sure they were all dead, for there have been hunters everywhere. No, there they are! Signs of life, of gentleness, of helplessness, of providence, of love. They just keep existing and loving and making more quails and whistling in the bushes.
From Thomas Merton’s Journal – November 7, 1965

did you lack anything?
He said to them, “When I sent you out without a purse, bag, or sandals did you lack anything?” They said, “no, not a thing.”
– Luke 22:35
card #3


card #2


I sent cards to myself…
…in early recovery.


it was a long way in…
…it’s a long way out.
(photo: the road to Monastery of Christ in The Desert, New Mexico – Sept. 2018)