I pray because I can’t help myself. I pray because I’m helpless. I pray because the need flows out of me all the time, waking and sleeping. It doesn’t change God. It changes me.
C.S. Lewis
I pray because I can’t help myself. I pray because I’m helpless. I pray because the need flows out of me all the time, waking and sleeping. It doesn’t change God. It changes me.
C.S. Lewis
What causes God pain, I believe, is not our sins as such (I don’t think God is easily offended), but the consequences of our sins that cause us so much pain: humiliation, frustration, guilt for harm done to others. In actual fact, the moment we accept negative feelings, sit with our despair, desolation, hopelessness or frustration, and the overwhelming sense of failure, God takes them all upon Himself, makes them His own, and joins us in our sufferings.
– Fr. Thomas Keating
All of us are much larger than the good or bad stories we tell about ourselves. Don’t get caught in “my” story, my hurts, my agenda. It’s too small. It’s not the whole you, not the Great You. It’s not the great river. It’s not where life is really going to happen. No wonder the Spirit is described as “flowing water” and as “a spring inside you” (John 4:10-14) or, as it states at the end of the Bible, as a “river of life” (Revelation 22:1-2). Your life is not really about “you.” It is part of a much larger stream called God. The separate self is finally an illusion for those who stay on the journey of prayer.
– Richard Rohr

Deep down in every man, woman, and child is the fundamental idea of God. We can find the Great Reality deep down within us. And when we find it, it changes our whole attitude toward life.
– Alcoholics Anonymous
This blog doesn’t have all that many followers and that’s fine with me. I was so happy to have received an email yesterday letting me know that “inner peace is now following The Edge of The Atlantic.”
Please know that I am slowing down in hopes that inner peace will soon catch up to me.


covered with yellow leaves
in morning rain
-Quel Deluge
he threw up his hands
& wrote the Universe dont exist
& died to prove it.
Full Moon over Ozone Park
Airport Bus rushing thru dusk to
Manhattan,
Jack the Wizard in his
grave at Lowell
for the first nite—
That Jack thru whose eyes I
saw
smog glory light
gold over Manhattan’s spires
will never see these
chimneys smoking
anymore over statues of Mary
in the graveyard
Black misted canyons
rising over the bleak
river
Bright doll-like ads
for Esso Bread—
Replicas multiplying beards
Farewell to the Cross—
Eternal fixity, the big headed
wax painted Buddha doll
pale resting incoffined—
Empty-skulled New
York streets
Starveling phantoms
filling city—
Wax dolls walking park
Ave,
Light gleam in eye glass
Voice echoing thru Microphones
Grand Central Sailor’s
arrival 2 decades later…
feeling melancholy—
Nostalgia for Innocent World
War II—
A million corpses running
across 42nd street
Glass buildings rising higher
transparent
aluminium—
artificial trees, robot sofas,
Ignorant cars—
One Way Street to Heaven.
*
Gray Subway Roar
A wrinkled brown faced fellow
with swollen hands
Leans to the blinking plate glass
mirroring white poles, the heavy car
sways on tracks uptown to Columbia—
Jack no more’ll step off at Penn Station
anonymous erranded, eat sandwich
& drink beer near New Yorker Hotel or walk,
under the shadow of Empire State.
Didn’t we stare at each other length of the car
& read headlines in faces thru Newspaper Holes?
Sexual cocked & horny bodied young, look
at beauteous Rimbaud & Sweet Jenny
riding to class from Columbus Circle.
“Here the kindly dopefiend lived.”
and the rednecked sheriff beat the longhaired
boy on the ass.
—103d street Broadway, me & Hal abused for sidewalk
begging twenty-five years ago.
Can I go back in time & lay my head on a teenage
belly upstairs on 110th Street?
or step off the iron car with Jack
at blue-tiled Columbia sign?
at last the old brown station where I had
a holy vision’s been rebuilt, clean ceramic
over the scum & spit & come of quarter century.
*
Flying to Maine in a trail of black smoke
Kerouac’s obituary conserves Time’s
Front Paragraphs—
Empire State in Heaven Sun Set Red,
White mist in old October
over the billion trees of Bronx—
There’s too much to see—
Jack saw sun set red over Hudson horizon
Two three decades back
thirtynine fourtynine fiftynine
sixtynine
John Holmes pursed his lips,
wept tears.
Smoke plumed up from Oceanside chimneys
plane roars toward Montauk
stretched in red sunset—
Northport, in the trees, Jack drank
rot gut & made haikus of birds
tweetling on his porch rail at dawn—
Fell down & saw Death’s golden lite
in Florida garden a decade ago.
Now taken utterly, soul upward,
& body down in wood coffin
& concrete slab-box.
I threw a kissed handful of damp earth
down on the stone lid
& sighed
looking in Creeley’s one eye,
Peter sweet holding a flower
Gregory toothless bending his
knuckle to Cinema machine—
and that’s the end of the drabble tongued
Poet who sounded his Knock-up
throughout the Northwest Passage.
Blue dusk over Saybrook, Holmes
sits down to dine Victorian—
& Time has a ten-page spread on
Homosexual Fairies!
Well, while I’m here I’ll
do the work—
and what’s the Work?
To ease the pain of the living.
Everything else, drunken
dumbshow.
October 22-29, 1969
Everyone has clay feet. It does not matter how far up the ladder of supposed holiness they might be, the clay feet that belong to the human condition are still there. We have to depend on God to keep them from cracking or breaking into pieces.
– Fr. Thomas Keating – from Divine Therapy and Addiction

“We cannot avoid using power, cannot escape the compulsion to afflict the world, so let us, cautious in diction and mighty in contradiction, love powerfully.”
―

(Photo: Grindstone, Maine – September 2019)